LOVE IS PURELY LUCK
Life is never easy. Nor, I believe, is it supposed to be. It’s a great big, long-assed, painful test that is all put in front of us to make dying look like the easy part. Kind of like taking the SAT’s while having your blood drawn for seventy or so years. I think this is the reason people who commit suicide are shunned by society as a whole. Not because we don’t necessarily agree with them on some level, but because they cheated and took the easy way out. Living is a b*tch. It ain’t pretty, and it ain’t easy. I think that possibly the worst test…the worst part of living…is love.
A collective gasp rolls through the room. “Love? How can something so wonderful be the worst part of living?” Because love, in all its forms, make normally sane human beingscrazy. It changes their personality, their values, their hopes, their plans. It is a desperate addiction that no one on earth has the power to break free of. There are no twelve steps for love addiction. There are no methadone clinics for the recently dumped (although we’ve all been there, and I think this would really be beneficial.); there is no rehab for someone who has an unrequited crush. Love is emotional cocaine, and the buzz lasts an equally short amount of time, before you’re out on the street again, TV in hand, trying to make that next score.
It was my recent viewing of a commercial for Match.com that led me to this conclusion. “If you aren’t in a relationship in six months, we’ll refund your money.” Translation? “If you are still un-dateable after we’ve thrown you everything we can possibly scrape up after six months, we’ll officially deem you, ‘social Ebola’, and you’ll be alone, and $60.00 richer.” Not even richer, actually. You will break even.
It made me wonder, “What kind of people (profiles), are you getting by the last week of your six months?” Guys who post their profile on a 3-D replica of a 10-sided die? Someone who posts, “We’ll be great together just as long as you stay away from the barrels in the garage…”? That person who posts the picture of them seated with their binky? What kind of people live in that gray area that exists in the microcosm of the last week of Match.com?
I, God willing, will never know. This is a part of the test of life that I am going to opt to take the “zero” on. I’m not condemning the people that choose this option, for it is a valuable resource in this day and age. I’m just going to bypass the whole experience, so as not to wind up in the last second, Match.com, cram session in the test of life. I guess I just have to hope I will do a little better than average on the “logic” portion of the test of life than I will on the “love” portion. The sadder but wiser girl’s the girl I’ll be. Yes sir. The sadder but wiser girl for me.
Always bear in mind that your own resolution to succeed is more important than any other one thing
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